Keith Solle of Laguna was presented with the "Most Fucked Up Feet in the Philippines" last monday evening at a lovely soiree held by the American Embassy.
"Every few years someone comes by with feet that look like they were stepped on by Godzilla after a hearty meal. As long as that person is an American national, we are more than happy to wipe the dust from our cocktail jackets and get crunk." Said Brian Camden, the Chairman of the US Embassy Club to Keep Embassy People Busy While Rejecting Filipino Visa Applications.
Keith's feet, or pedisii in the Latin, have multiple bruises on the insoles, most likely from Jean Claude Van Damme Style Mui Thai training. His toenails bring to mind the broken glass windown from the Ferris Bueler's Day Off after the famous Ferrari fiasco. Lastly, his feet are somewhat flatter than average, which isn't that bad, but coupled with the other stuff, managed to put him over the top.
At his 25 minute acceptance speech, Mr. Solle remarked, "are there any more pigs in a blanket?" He said other stuff too, but nothing really stuck.
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